Relationship Reflection

Humans are naturally social creatures. We need others to survive from the first breath we take in this world. This being said, we each have our own unique needs and wants in regards to relationships. Depending on our innate personalities some of us crave a lot of fast-paced social activity buzzing along around and with us, some of us are happiest in our own space and visiting with that one special person on special occassions, and a myriad of other preferences can be applied. The truth is, our experiences and relationships shape our world, shape US.


The most significant relationship I've ever had in my life is with my son. He not only shapes who I have grown to be today, but has shed light and enlightened who I have been in the past, and how I continue to grow as the moments and years pass. I am in a constant state of self and life exploration and reflection because of my relationship with him. Because of my choice to be in deep relationship with him.
This is true partnership in the sense that I am so fully aware of my impact on him as he grows in this world. I strive to always hear him, fully see him, truly understand what he needs and wants in this life, This relationship is also different, because I don't necessarily expect the same things in return that I would expect from an adult friend. He has my service and heart completely and the ways he feeds my heart is by simply existing.

My deepest adult relationship is with his dad. What has shaped us is our shared experiences. Our ability to reflect with each other, process, to Dream and Imagine together.We are in service to each other, share the loads of life, assuage the pains, share the joys, plan for more experiences, live the same moments, and are the first people we want to inform about outside moments that happen separately. The most significant factor in this relationship is that it is our Choice. We choose to continue, we choose each other, and when challenges arise it always comes back to that choice. Challenges seem to happen when communication falls short for one or both of us. Communication, in any sense, is the basic connection and building block to a relationship. Having the insight and ability to fully reach another person through their unique style/mode of communicating is what will determine so much. Because you need to feel heard and seen to feel connected to another!

As a teacher and caregiver I am in constant relationship with my children. I take this position very seriously. I remember to this day how deeply adults affected me as a child. The smallest acknowledgment, look, generosity, comment, judgment, kindness has stuck with me either subconsiously or very consciously. Because of my Choice to actively reflect so fully on my childhood and adulthood, I am able to see and understand relationship on a deeper level. Relationship is the ability to look within yourself and beyond yourself, to put another first, to accept another putting you first, To have an adult model all of this genuinely to a child, to show them that you Choose to be in relationship with them, you Choose kindness and openness, you Enjoy bringing joy to them and learning about them. This feeds a growing heart and mind, and sets in motion a truly unstoppable expectation for self and life.